Okay, two stories. Wait, make that three.

First, many many moons ago, when my little cousin, Erinslick, was in either high school or early college, (Ow! Okay, not that many moons ago!) So anyway, as I was saying, she was just about that age when she was testing out whether she might share a naughty joke with the elders in her family. Well, I don’t remember the joke, but I DO remember that it featured “Bowm chick-a WOW wow!” in it, and we all totally lost it. It was so totally unexpected out of little Miss Erin Slick from Punkin Crick!

Second, not so many moons ago, we were all over at my parents’ house, the little ones were all tucked in upstairs, and the grown ups were all joking around and cracking each other up like we do, and I was trying to remember that porno sound effect from Erin’s joke. It was one of those silly moments when I just HAD to have that onomatopoeia (wait, is that an onomatopoeia? oh yeah, it’s an onomatopoeia of a 70’s porn guitar. now where was i?) Okay, so I just absolutely HAD to hear it. NOW. So I was like, hey Mom, Erin wouldn’t mind if I just called her up out of the blue and asked her to do her porn sound effect on speaker phone to a whole roomful of people, right? And Mom says, ya know, I really don’t think she would.

So I called her, explained my dilemma, and asked whether she’d mind if I put her on speaker phone. Being Erin, she did not. Being Erin, she took it all totally in stride, as if cousins calling out of the blue and asking her to make porn sound effects on speakerphone were, if not a common occurrence, not at all unexpected.

And thus, “Bowm chick-a WOW wow!” became a shortcut to that moment, to a giggly frame of mind. And for this, and many other things bright and shiny (if less pornographic), we love Erin.

And that leads us to tonight, and our drive home from one of the giggliest meals we’ve ever shared with our little ones. So the girls are singing and making the inevitable fart jokes and acting goofy in the back seat, and we’re all laughing, and one of our girls, whose name shall not be mentioned because if she ever reads this I will surely suffer, starts singing “Bowm chick-a WOW wow!” (Um, little pitchers? Big ears?)

I’m sitting there next to Cabana Boy in the front, face forward, trying to control some serious guffaws as the “Bowm chick-a WOW wows” multiply in volume and intensity, not to mention creativity, wondering how I can not react to this. I mean, we all know that to crack up at something a kid does is tantamount to an invitation to repeat it ad nauseum, ad infinitum, right? And then to like, go try it out at school and at friends’ houses. And you know, what parent wouldn’t want other parents and teachers speculating on how, exactly, this little girl knows porn music so well? Cabana Boy got the best of me though. He gave me one of those sly sideways grins and told the girls, keep it up! I think Mommy’s gonna explode!

And I did. The End.